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Stupid Instructor Stories

Know How Thy Feces Be Assembled


(April, 2004) It really doesn’t matter if you pay attention when putting your gear together. After all, the Gear Fairy is watching over you and will correct any errors — right? Guess again. Here’s a story about just what can happen when you don’t pay attention.

Gotta’ Have Just One Last Cigarette


(June, 2004) Over the past 30 years, I’ve seen some pretty incredible examples of smokers who attempt to combine their addiction with diving. They are funny to watch — in a morbid sort of way. I thought I’d share a few of these with you so that you, too, could laugh — all the way to the grave.

Yes, I Actually Saw This

Blue Grotto

(August, 2004) It’s a basic tenet of entry-level diver training that you do not take students to open water until they have demonstrated not only complete mastery of all the fundamental skills, but a high degree of comfort with them as well. Read about an instructor who did not get the message..

Fairy Tales Instructors Believe

Eye-Level Turkey

(October, 2004) Most of us trust instructors to be more knowledgeable and experienced than the average diver. Still, there are a number of popular diving myths that most instructors seem perfectly willing to believe and perpetuate. Some of these myths have even made their way into widely read diving textbooks. In this issue of, we’ll examine some of these popular myths, revealing what is fact…and what is fiction. Find out more…

Stupid Group Leader Tricks


(December, 2004) According to the instructors that work there, the dive store owners, managers and employees who lead group trips to Captain Don's Habitat tend to have their feces fully assembled. Unfortunately, that’s not always the case at every dive destination. While most group leaders do an excellent job of meeting their group members’ needs, there are exceptions. Find out more…

The Dumbest Instructor Ever? (Part I)

Instroketer Patch

(February, 2005) When you get done reading this issue’s “Stupid Diver” story, you are going to wonder whether it is possible to be any stupider that the diver it talks about. Guess what? It is. And the person involved wasn’t just a diver, he was an instructor. Fantastic but true. Find out more…