Aftermath
Of course, the question still remained as to what to do about Idiot Diver. By not admitting that he lacked the skills necessary to do this dive safely, he not only put himself at risk, but everyone else. Had the boat hit the wall and sunk, or if the dock line had managed to put both props out of commission, 24 people would have been stranded two and a half miles from help, in a current whose Hawai’ian name translates as “Fastest Way to Tahiti.”
There were several approaches I could take:
- I could ignore the situation, acting as though it had never happened.
- I could take the sensitive approach. You know: “Obviously you had some difficulties today. We should discuss them and see how you can avoid them in the future.”
- On the other hand, I could do what I was sorely tempted to do, which was to point to Idiot Diver in everyone else’s presence and say, “You folks almost didn’t make it home today because this dickless worm didn’t have the guts to admit he wasn’t good enough to make this dive.”
Clearly, this diver’s transgressions were too heinous to ignore. For a lesser transgression, the “sensitive” approach would likely be the most productive — and consistent with our company policy of not making customers feel bad about their inabilities (unless they were criminally stupid). This guy was criminally stupid.
Nevertheless, I did stop short of publicly humiliating him. For the entire trip back, Idiot Diver sat in the same spot in the cabin, his eyes staring in the general direction of this feet. I don’t know whether it was in shame over his actions, or the fact he was still traumatized over having had the opportunity to meet God up close and personal, or both. I didn’t care.
What I did do was take the opportunity to walk through the cabin several times on the trip home. Each time I passed by Idiot Diver, I would stop and simply glare at him for several seconds. The diver would look up long enough to make eye contact, then immediately go back to examining the deck. I doubt if he ever set foot on a dive boat again — which is no doubt a Good Thing.
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